When I was a child, dogs were everywhere — much as they are today — just not always on leash or under the close guidance of their owners.
My family had a lot of dogs. At one point, we had seven.
If a dog growled at me or one of my siblings, my parents’ response was simple:
“What did you do to the dog?”
In other words: the dog is telling you something, so stop doing that.
A great deal has changed since then, for both dogs and children.
It is not necessarily that people knew more back then. In many ways, we knew less. But dogs often had more freedom, and people were not as likely to treat dogs as constant, close-contact companions in quite the way many families do today.
That change in lifestyle matters.
Dogs and Children Need Guidance, Not Assumptions
Early in my career, I realized how important dog behavior education is — not only for my clients, but for the safety and well-being of dogs and the people who live with and love them.
Many people grow up with an incomplete or inaccurate understanding of what dogs are saying with body language. They may recognize obvious signals, but miss the quieter ones — the hesitation, the turning away, the stillness, the tension, the look that says, “Please stop.”
Helping people see dogs more clearly has become one of the most important parts of my work.
Because healthy relationships between kids and dogs do not happen by accident.
They require education, supervision, and a willingness to consider the dog’s point of view.
Safety Is a Two-Way Street
Teaching a dog to live well with people is only part of the equation.
We also have to teach people — especially children — how to live respectfully with dogs.
That means:
- honoring a dog’s need for personal space
- teaching dogs to respect ours
- supervising interactions carefully
- interrupting and redirecting play when needed
- noticing when either the child or the dog is becoming overwhelmed
When young children are involved, supervision is not optional.
And by supervision, I mean real supervision — two eyes on the child and two eyes on the dog, in real time.
Not listening from another room.
Not glancing up from a phone.
Not assuming everything is fine because “they love each other.”
If the dog is safe from the child, the child is more likely to be safe with the dog.
That principle matters.
Tolerance Is Not the Same as Comfort
One of the most important things for adults to understand is that a dog may tolerate something without actually being comfortable with it.
A puppy or young dog may put up with awkward touch, crowding, grabbing, or intrusion. But tolerance is not permission. And it is certainly not a guarantee for the future.
A dog who tolerated something yesterday may have far less tolerance when sick, injured, tired, stressed, elderly, or simply done.
That is why adults must pay attention not only to what a dog allows, but to how the dog is feeling.
Children can learn. They can ask questions. They can be taught what, when, where, why, and how.
Dogs cannot understand why a child is doing something uncomfortable or intrusive. They can only respond as dogs do.
Dogs Always Have a Reason
Despite the way dog bites are often described, dogs do not bite “out of nowhere” or “for no reason.”
There is always a reason from the dog’s point of view.
That does not excuse unsafe behavior. It does mean that prevention depends on noticing, understanding, and responding earlier.
Dog behavior education is not extra. It is essential.
That is especially true in homes with babies, toddlers, young children, visiting children, or families thinking about adding a dog.
The more clearly adults can read dogs and manage interactions, the safer and healthier life becomes for everyone involved.
Want help creating safer, healthier relationships between kids and dogs?
The Cooperative Dog offers private coaching, behavior consultations, and educational support to help families make better decisions and build safer everyday life with dogs.
